What therapists tell clients about getting through January

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What therapists tell clients about getting through January

The holidays are over, the credit card bill just hit, and the sun sets at 4:47 p.m. If you’re feeling more drained than motivated right now, there’s a biological reason: Research shows that mood-regulating serotonin activity drops during darker months, while melatonin production increases. In other words, your body is telling you to slow down just when society tells you to hustle harder.

That tension is exactly why January is one of the hardest times to overhaul your life. You’re running on fumes, adjusting to less light, and the “New Year, New You” pressure isn’t helping. The last thing you need is another list of generic advice you’ve heard a thousand times.

Thriveworks asked 15 mental health professionals what they actually tell clients (and do themselves) to get through this month. Whether you’re craving rest or desperately need stimulation, there’s something here for you.

1. Your brain is wired to slow down in winter. It’s not laziness.

Feelings of low energy, mood shifts, and wanting more alone time during darker, colder months are completely normal reactions to changes in daylight. Serotonin production drops, melatonin increases, and your circadian rhythm shifts. Instead of fighting it, practice self-compassion: These seasonal fluctuations are common, predictable, and not signs you’re doing something wrong.

– Monica Cwynar, licensed clinical social worker at Thriveworks

2. Skip the resolutions. Try reflection instead.

January is an ideal time for reflection, not forced action. Instead of jumping into change, acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) encourages using mindful awareness to understand what your feelings might be telling you about your values. Try asking yourself:

• When did I feel most alive, present, or fulfilled this past year?
• Where do I feel sadness, guilt, comparison, or judgment?
• What might these emotions reveal about what matters most to me?

This isn’t about creating resolutions. It’s about identifying what genuinely matters to you before deciding whether (or how) to act.

– Carissa Gustafson, Ph.D., clinical psychologist and author of “Reclaim Your Life: Acceptance and Commitment Therapy in 7 Weeks”

Thriveworks

3. Treat January like a season of intentional softness.

January is basically the Monday of the year. My advice? Stop trying to “power through” like it’s a moral achievement. Instead, treat winter like a season of intentional softness. Light the candles. Wear the fleece. Say no more often.

I tell my clients: If your nervous system is asking for rest, don’t respond with productivity goals or resolutions you might not keep. Respond with soup, boundaries, and a playlist that doesn’t pretend everything’s fine.

– Melissa Galica, Ph.D., licensed professional counselor

4. Practice ‘curiosity over criticism.’

If you’re feeling low, don’t shame yourself for it. Get curious about what your body and mind might be asking for.

For example: Instead of thinking “Why can’t I just get it together?” try “What would feel supportive right now, whether that’s rest, warmth, connection, or a change of scenery?” When you stop fighting the season and start responding to it, January becomes much more manageable.

– Dana McNeil, Psy.D., licensed psychologist and marriage and family therapist

5. Build ‘anchors’ that carry you when motivation doesn’t.

The trick isn’t to fight the slump. It’s to structure around it. I tell clients to treat winter like a deployment. Don’t wait to feel motivated. Instead, build routines that carry you even when your mood doesn’t.

Set light anchors (like morning sunlight exposure and a predictable bedtime), movement anchors (like 10 to 15 minutes of walking), and social anchors (like one planned human interaction per week).

You’re not trying to thrive in January. You’re trying to make the season as predictable as possible so it can’t jerk you around.

– Blaine Stephens, licensed professional counselor at Thriveworks

6. You don’t need January to be great. Just steady.

January feels heavy because the pace of activities drops and the excitement of the holidays disappears. When everything slows down, the emotional crash that was hiding under all the busyness finally surfaces.

Here’s the permission slip you need: You don’t have to make January a great month. You only need to make it a steady one.

– Courtney Tracy, Psy.D., licensed clinical social worker and author of “Your Unconscious is Showing”

Thriveworks

 

7. Make cooking your weekly self-care ritual.

Pick a cozy recipe to try each week. Think chili, homemade soup, or fresh-baked cookies. This works because it builds in multiple mood boosters: Planning requires leaving the house for groceries (resist the urge to order online), cooking gives you a warm indoor activity, and you get a reward at the end. Bonus points if you invite someone over to enjoy your creation with you.

– Madeline Weinfeld Shill, licensed clinical social worker

8. Leave your house every single day (yes, even when it’s cold).

Even 10 minutes of fresh air and daylight can shift your mood more than most people expect. The key is making it appealing: Pair your walk with something you actually want, like grabbing your favorite coffee or listening to a new podcast episode. A huge part of what makes winter feel dreadful is the darkness, so getting outside during daylight hours, even on overcast days, helps regulate your circadian rhythm and boost serotonin.

– Eliza Davis, licensed clinical social worker

9. Create a low-stakes January bucket list.

Make a list of small activities that interest you, are new to you, or push you just outside your comfort zone. These don’t need to be elaborate. Think: Try that bakery you keep walking past, finally watch that documentary everyone’s talking about, text an old friend, rearrange your living room, take a different route on your walk. The goal is breaking up the monotony with tiny pockets of novelty.

– Tori Lyn Mills, licensed clinical professional counselor at Thriveworks

10. Lean into coziness on purpose (the Danish call it hygge).

Create nurturing rituals that align with the season instead of fighting it. I like the Danish concept of hygge, the act of slowing down and creating a warm atmosphere to be together. Plan informal get-togethers around the fireplace, host a movie night with the kids, or invite a friend over for tea and candlelight. The goal is intentional coziness, not productivity.

– Stella Kimbrough, licensed clinical social worker

11. Give yourself permission to just… rest.

A new year doesn’t mean you need to immediately start working on self-change. That messaging quietly implies you’re not good enough, even if you had a solid year. Winter naturally gifts you more time indoors, under covers, moving slowly. Take it.

If you want to ease back into habits you dropped during the holiday rush, like exercise or journaling, great. But rest is also a complete activity, not just preparation for productivity.

– Laura Buscemi, licensed professional counselor at Thriveworks

Thriveworks

12. Stack your calendar with things to look forward to.

The best way to actually enjoy January is to plan things you can look forward to. That might mean hosting a vision board party for some of your friends, planning a short weekend trip, or making a January “hobby menu.”

I also recommend incorporating a weekly ritual that feels fun. For example, maybe on Fridays you go to a new coffee shop and get a latte and a pastry. Or on Sunday nights (to mitigate the Sunday scaries), you make a cozy soup for you and your family.

– Suzanne Wallach, Psy.D., licensed marriage and family therapist

13. Text a friend to say ‘January is rough. How are you holding up?’

There’s a good chance someone in your life is feeling the same post-holiday dread you are. Instead of assuming everyone else has it together, reach out. A simple text can spark the kind of honest connection that makes the month feel less isolating for both of you.

– Taylor Hiers, licensed professional counselor at Thriveworks

14. Let ‘this is hard’ and ‘I can still find ease’ exist at the same time.

Give yourself permission to feel what’s coming up, whether that’s unmotivated, down, or depleted, without judgment. You can have a perfectly good day doing nothing but watching your favorite old movies. You can add tiny glimmers to the grayness without pretending the grayness isn’t there. It’s about making space for “this is hard” and “I can still find moments of ease” to coexist.

– Lauren Auer, licensed clinical professional counselor

15. Give each month a theme to break up the monotony.

Pick a low-pressure “theme” for each month to create variety and anticipation. January could be creativity month (try a new hobby or creative outlet), February is cooking month (one new recipe a week), and March is reconnection month (reach out to one old friend each week). This breaks up the sameness of winter and gives you small things to look forward to throughout the season.

– Alexandra Cromer, licensed professional counselor at Thriveworks

This story was produced by Thriveworks and reviewed and distributed by Stacker.